We'll be changing gears and tackling the problem, or dare I say the blessing of pain. This week I was caught off guard by a verse in one of my favorite songs: "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" by Gordon Lightfoot. I've heard this song probably a hundred times, but never has a line in it stood out so vividly.
"Does anyone know where the love of god goes when the waves turn the minutes to hours?"
Where does the love of God go?
I have asked this countless times. Especially during the last couple of years. I know I'm young, and I know I'm still very naive, but my heart has gone through what I call "the hurt."
I'm no longer ashamed to admit, depression and I are well acquainted.
So as my manifold hangups, scars, inadequacies, and wounds are still sensitive to the touch, and as my eyes still well with tears from some of my very recent memories, I'm going to begin to answer that very appropriate question:
"Where DOES the love of god go when the waves turn the minutes to hours?"
Let's start by hearing God's side of the story.
“Who will have pity on you, O Jerusalem? Who will mourn for you? Who will stop to ask how you are? You have rejected me,” declares the Lord. You keep on backsliding, So I will lay hands on you and destroy you; I can no longer show compassion. I will winnow them… I will bring bereavement and destruction on my people for they have not changed their ways. – Jeremiah 15: 5-7
This all from the same Loving God of the last two posts? Yes sir, yes mam.
Let’s take a moment to study the word “winnow” or “thresh”. Here comes the Youtube! Picture yourself the wheat. Your God handles the mallet of your pain, and your savior is the sheet, making sure to not let the slightest usable kernel of grain go to waste.
Notice the purposefulness of the mallet handler. He isn't blindly swinging away. He is not just destroying the wheat, but he is going for something.
I know what that wheat feels like! I'm sure you do too!
As I think back on my darkest times, on "the hurt," I can see how God was working me out, and separating the chaff of my pride, guilt, ignorance, and greed from the grain of who he wants me to be. The real me. Consider C.S. Lewis' stance on the "problem" of pain.
"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks to us in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: It is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world."
Lastly, let me point out a couple pictures of the resolution of the previous verse in Jeremiah, this one also from Jeremiah a few chapters later.
"I myself will gather the remnant of my flock out of all the countries where I have driven them and will bring them back to their pasture, where they will be fruitful and increase in number. The days are coming," declares the Lord, "when I will raise up to David a righteous Branch" (Jesus) a King who will reign wisely and do what is just and right in the land. In his days Judah will be saved and Israel will live in safety. This is the name by which he will be called: The Lord Our Righteousness." - Jeremiah 23, 5-6
So, is 100% of your righteousness resting in The Lord, and not on your own humility, works, or knowledge?
Unfortunately for my poor heart, I am far from there, but the Lord has told me not to worry.
I have plenty of pain left to go through.
Yet, I am not afraid. Yes, I will hate it, and probably doubt his love like I always unfortunately tend to, but Love has promised to always go before me, never give me more then I can handle with him, that he will always take me back, and that he will never let me go. Even when I do.
And I know that "when" is not a question of if, but when, so I will rely on grace alone.
And rather then run away from my pains, I will open myself up to letting Love get whatever out of me he wants.
So, where does the love go?
We all need different answers don't we? So, I'll wait for you to ask Love for yourself.
Thanks for reading!
~ Daniel
Curious about the Gordon Lightfoot song? Check it out!
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